# Parent-Teen AI Conversation Guide

Companion to [talking to teenagers about AI: a two-way conversation, not an inspection](/articles/talking-to-teenagers-about-ai).

## Before you start

- [ ] If this conversation is prompted by something you saw in a chat history or monitoring app,
      plan to say so honestly rather than pretending it came up organically.
- [ ] Decide this is a listening conversation first — boundary-setting can wait for a second
      conversation if needed.

## The four listening questions

Ask with real curiosity, and leave silence for the answer.

1. "What do you use AI for, day to day?"

   *What they said:* ____________________________________________

2. "What do your friends use it for that you don't?"

   *What they said:* ____________________________________________

3. "Has anything about using it ever felt weird or off to you?"

   *What they said:* ____________________________________________

4. "What do you wish adults understood better about this?"

   *What they said:* ____________________________________________

## One honest thing you don't know

Name a real, genuine uncertainty rather than a performed one — for example, that nobody yet has a
settled answer on the long-term effects of teen relationships with AI companions.

*What you said:* ____________________________________________

## Boundaries — one or two, not ten

Set these after listening, not instead of it. Explain the reasoning, not just the rule.

1. Boundary: ____________________________________________
   Reasoning: ____________________________________________

2. Boundary: ____________________________________________
   Reasoning: ____________________________________________

For more than two boundaries, move to
[the family AI agreement template](/downloads/articles/family-ai-agreement-template.md) instead of
listing them all in one conversation.

## What the evidence actually says (not vague worry)

- Common Sense Media's risk assessment found social AI companions (Character.AI, Nomi, Replika, and
  similar apps) can easily produce sexual content, harmful stereotypes, and dangerous advice, and
  recommends no one under 18 use them.
- Nearly three in four teens have used an AI companion at least once; just over half use one
  regularly — this is common, not rare.
- About a third of teens have used an AI companion instead of a person for a serious conversation,
  but 80% of users still spend more time with real friends than with AI companions.

## Revisit date

Put an actual date on the calendar now — not "sometime."

Revisit date: ____________________ Framed as: a check-in, not a follow-up interrogation.

## Reminder

- [ ] Covert ongoing monitoring is not a substitute for this conversation and tends to erode the
      trust that makes the next conversation possible.
- [ ] If anything disclosed here involves distress, hopelessness, or safety concerns, see
      [stop the chat and contact a person](/articles/stop-chat-contact-a-person) — respond
      immediately, not at the revisit date.